Very Classy by Derek Blasberg

Author:Derek Blasberg
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Penguin Group US
Published: 2011-09-30T04:00:00+00:00

Frenemies, Fair-Weather Friends,and Backstabbing Bitches

In my day, I’ve seen enough girl-on-girl crime—Mean Girlstype drama, when girls are randomly mean to each other because of insecurity, jealousy, or purely for entertainment—to write a whole series of made-for-TV movies on the topic. (Full disclosure: As a young man, I was a total mean girl.)

Girls stealing their friend’s sweaters; girls stealing their friend’s boyfriends; girls calling a friend fat behind her back. It’s by no means a new problem. (If you want to know the true meaning of the word backstabber, look up the ancient Greek story of Electra and her mom, Clytemnestra.) And let’s be honest: XX-CHROMOSOME-ENCODED meanness is not a phenomenon that’s going to disappear anytime soon. As long as y’all are hormonal, you’re going to have your bitchy days. I’m not blaming you for that, but something should be said for trying to avoid sustained bitchiness levels.

There are a few things a young girl can do to sidestep the drama (’cause there’s no avoiding it altogether—the sooner you know this, the sooner you can be prepared). Apart from trying to keep your own man-and-sweater-stealing bouts to a minimum, be on the lookout for the type of girl who is friends with you only when it’s beneficial to her: a fair-weather friend, who can often turn into a full-blown frenemy. [If you’re not sure you can tell the difference, see “Are Your Friends BFFs or Backstabbers?,” pp. 170-71.]

When I first got my driver’s license, my parents always told me a good driver was a cautious one. Same thing applies here. With the exception of your ab solutely bestest friend, don’t say anything to a girl you wouldn’t want mass e-mailed to your entire social circle. Be wary of girls who obviously want something besides your quality time, whether it’s help with algebra homework or free rein at a new club where your boyfriend DJs.

A Lady knows how to give a compliment—and mean it. She also knows how to receive a compliment gracefully.

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